[writing] Project Epsilon - Prologue

[djtenku]

Title: Maddening Shroud
Word Count: 1507
Summary: Talks. Uncertainty. Possession.

August 13, 2011

5:05am LST

Rowan washed his calloused hands for the seventh time, and he still felt like it was enough. Those words, that…dream; and for it to happen so suddenly. Again, he felt his throat, tracing the long welt. Yukinko, the rather hairy black and white cat voiced her concern as she jumped on the kitchen counter next to him, rubbing against his arm. “I know,” he muttered.

He shuffled to the living room and plopped down on the couch, and sighed deeply as he buried his head into his hands, wishing away the haunting afterimages desperately. Couldn’t I have one moment of peace? Rowan asked himself. As if, he answered with acid. Maybe when I die. “Maybe,” he echoed, to no one in particular. But that wasn’t going to work; it didn’t before and it most certainly won’t now. Or ever.

Three slow knocks at the door, just as he asked for. “It’s open,” Rowan said, looking up briefly. It was Kento, rough looking as usual in an A shirt, showing all sorts of scars and blue jeans with sandals. His good eye stared at him, intense but equally tired as he. “There’s some coffee in the fridge, if you like.”

“Iced coffee?” He asked after a big yawn. “Not what I was expecting but…” Kento’s voice trailed off, muttering about something else. Rowan caught the airbone can neatly and said his thanks as Kento diligently sat on the adjacent armchair. “Can’t sleep, huh?”

“I haven’t a wink in about two weeks,” Rowan replied.

Kento popped open the can and took a sip. “Must’ve made you insane.” Rowan frowned. “Ah, it’s early; you know what I mean.”

“It’s worse this time,” Rowan began, sinking back into the couch, closing his odd colored eyes. “I feel like I’m drowning in water, or something…and I hear someone on the other side of it, something about disobeying. Everytime I reach out, when I’m not paralyzed, there’s glass.” There was a look of subtle disbelief on Kento’s scarred face when he opened his eyes.

“Glass? Like, being stuck in a tube?” he asked.

“Quite possibly. And, I wrote something on the mirror in the bathroom.” Kento got up with a wince and disappeared into the hallway.

“Is this the first time that’s happened?” He came back, clearly concerned.

Rowan nodded. “As far as I’m concerned, I don’t even move when I have an attack. I was sitting right over there when it started and somehow I ended up in there… I don’t know. I tried to call Maria about that, but her phone just rings.” He finally opened his can and nearly emptied it. “You don’t look so well. Nightmares?”

“That evident, huh?” Kento scoffed. “I got killed this time protecting a little girl. Well, killed by her actually. The thing was that, everyone was running past her from this shadow; I was the only one that heard her crying, so I went after her. The shadow was gone by the time I got to her, it was gone.” He winced again, putting a hand to his back. The dull aches were returning.“Sorry,” he said tersely. “But, the shadow somehow possessed her and she…she stabbed me once, through my heart. She told me, as I was dying, that I can’t save everyone – it’s impossible.”

“It is,” Rowan said evenly, ignoring the scowl Kento gave him. “It’s your fear.” He then looked up at him.

“Maybe it is,” Kento said slowly. The idea was frivolous at best; he was always taught that fear was an emotion unwanted. The words certainly made him think.

The cat perched itself on the armrest of the couch and Rowan reached over to pet it. “Kento,” he said suddenly, “if I were to go fully insane, would you shoot me?”

Kento balked at the question, nearly spilling his drink. “Why in the hell would I?”

“I’ve read up on it a little, and in the known twelve cases, they have gone on massacres, killing at least thirty or more. But,” he said with a pause, “they weren’t executed. As a result, they were locked away in…asylums and never heard from again. Worse, I believed they were experimented on too. I’d rather be dead than go to a nuthouse.

“According to Maria, there are about four stages; I’m just about at the end of stage two, and that’s basically the point of no return. I can vouch – the medicine barely works.” Rowan barely noticed his hands were shaking. “I…am afraid of what’s going to happen to me now that I’ve reached this point. Even though Maria’s working on it, time is running out.”

“Even if I was forced to put a gun to your head, I wouldn’t shoot. At all.” Kento fiddled with the now-empty can, more awake than he was fifteen minutes ago. “Rowan, you’ve made it this far,” he said quietly, “So what history says otherwise? It’s about how you deal with this; head held high or head low in defeat. It might not be as bad as it sounds, but there’s the good chance you’ll have to fight it.”

“I don’t exactly have anything to fight for,” Rowan said with a mirthless laugh. “It would make a difference if I were engaged and if I had a child on the way. But right now…” He shook his head.

“Well, you like Maria, don’t you?” Kento smirked when Rowan’s eyes went a little wide. “She obviously cares about you; if she – or for that fact any of us – hadn’t, who knows what could’ve happened. Perhaps you would’ve been successful in committing suicide a while back? The least, the absolute least you can do is have a little faith. It works wonders, trust me on that.”

Rowan’s glower slowly turned into a grin. He was right. “I wonder…ah, nevermind. The fact of the matter, is that I’m kinda glad to have someone to talk to about this, without them thinking I’m totally crazy.”

“I’ve never pegged you as crazy. A little strange, yeah, but not that.”

“I guess,” Rowan started, “but isn’t that what a brother would say?” The words came out as nonchalant, but the look on Kento’s face made him laugh. “Sorry, it’s the only child thing going on and this coffee. It does that to me sometimes. In all seriousness though, you’re like a brother to me.” He held out his fist and Kento did as well, and tapped it. “Thanks, man.”

“Get some sleep, will ya?”

“I’ll try. Oh! The name.”

“Name?” Kento echoed. “Oh. I haven’t a clue, honestly. I’m letting her have dibs, but I don’t know if we’re gonna have a boy or a girl, at least not for another week. Shin already has a name in mind should we have a boy, but…completely stumped if we have a girl.” He stood up and stretched, ignoring the backache that had been steadily building.

“Lily,” Rowan said suddenly. There was a strange look on Rowan’s pale face as he stood up, as if he was on the verge of trance, or worse, an attack. “Name her that.”

Kento raised an eyebrow. “Lily? That…has a nice ring to it.”

“In fact…” He thumbed through several sketchbooks and papers before finding a solitary sheet; he folded it three times and retrieved an envelope, diligently sealing it. “Don’t open this until she’s born,” he said as he handed the envelope.

Kento took it, not sure what was happening, as if Rowan knew something he clearly didn’t know about. Stranger things have happened though. “I will,” he said firmly. “You alright?”

Rowan nodded quickly. To his dismay, Kento didn’t seem convinced at all. “Please get some sleep,” he told him. “Later.”

As soon as the door closed, Rowan collapsed onto the couch, seeing spots and stars as he slipped in and out of consciousness until he only saw white. He could feel the cold sweat building up on his skin and his heart beneath his resting hand, and heard his short, shallow breath. He could do nothing about it, because he was paralyzed. There was a sudden gust of warm wind that passed him by and underneath as well. That was impossible – the windows weren’t even open.

Rowan heard slow, deliberate footsteps after the door; and he knew it wasn’t Kento at all. There was a sense of wrongness in the air. No sound left his lips, but he concentrated with getting air.

“How convenient that this is happening isn’t it, Rowan Xander?” said a dark, smooth voice. It sounded like it came from a long tunnel. “My…you’re quiet the specimen.” An icy pair of fingers pressed his neck. “High strung though.”

“Who are you?” Rowan snarled. “What do you want.”

Dark laughter. “Oh, that’s no concern…ah, excuse my response. I’ve come to collect my collateral. You see, dear Rowan, rules have been broken. Delicate rules even. They were broken around, oh, October of 2008. Don’t think that I would find out about that? Ha!”

Rowan became even more lightheaded.

“Your fool of a father and that sweet, little doctor? It’s a shame they broke their contract with me…and you know why you haven’t heard from them?” The voice whispered into his ear. “They’re dead.”

Sudden rage snapped Rowan from his trance and despite being blind, he managed to wrap his hand around whoever’s thin neck and slammed it into the wall, knocking some hanging frames loose.

“And no one knows how they died either – both looked like accidents,” it continued. “As I’ve said before, you are collateral. No one can do anything about that; your organization that you take part of? Terminated! They can’t protect you. You. Are. Mine.”

Rowan roared as he began to draw back his fist, but then the spell suddenly returned; he lost grip and leaned against the wall before dropping to his knees and over.

“Ah, lovely…” Maximus Orion said as he looked at Rowan’s now-unconscious form. “Such a fighter too.”

Oh, the tests he was going to run.